Weekend Whimsy: Stripper Polls?

bcs trophy
The latest NCAA striptease leaves Bobby Bowden desperately clinging to the waistband of his victory briefs, while also forcing the Crimson Tide to give an encore performance for tip rail regulars. The NCAA storyline reads, “no one is greater than the association”, and Florida State and Alabama are made examples.  On the surface, the thought of student athletes taking exams or using textbooks wouldn’t signal a rule violation. But it has, at each program’s expense.

So, if you’re USC, and aware of the current actions of “vacate happy” enforcers, how fearful are you, knowing the suit wearing DJ may be playing your song soon? The Reggie Bush investigation is three years running without a verdict, and USC is positioned to expose more than the Seminoles and Tide. Those programs may vacate victories, but have no conference championships, national titles, or Heisman Trophies to sacrifice for the penalized period. The effects may leave them waltzing half dressed for coming seasons, but the Trojans could end up bare assed, stripped of the essentials and facing lifelong embarrassment….supposedly.

But fear not, Empire, because the words of our outgoing Pac 10 President are comforting and sensible.

In an exit interview with Yahoo Sports, Tom Hanson was asked about the possibility of the NCAA stripping USC of the 2004 National Championship, if Bush is found to be ineligible for the period. The simple answer is another question…How could they?

The NCAA can vacate victories and conference titles, but how can they strip a National Championship, if the association doesn’t recognize any? Our football champions are crowned by media sources, which would leave those entities with the power to reward or revoke. According to the NCAA, there is no recognized football champion for the year 2004, so there’s nothing to remove. Asking their enforcers to remove a national title would be about as sensible as playing strip poker at a nudist colony…following?

It’s the same issue as the Heisman Trophy, which is also presented by an outside party. Would the Downtown’s Athletic Club strip a player of his trophy because his parents were taking money, when O.J. Simpson wasn’t stripped of his, after taking lives? Would the media and coaches’ demand their crystal ball, so it can be presented to the Oklahoma Sooners, after they were soundly beaten 55-19 in the championship game?

I guess we’ll just have to climb that mountain when we get there, even if it takes another three years. But honestly, the longer it takes, the more I’m willing to speculate that there is no sufficient evidence to link the university to having knowledge of Bush family improprieties allegedly occuring 100 miles away.

[Yahoo Sports]

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~ by Anthony on June 20, 2009.

One Response to “Weekend Whimsy: Stripper Polls?”

  1. […] post: Weekend Whimsy: Stripper Polls? « The Trojan Empire addthis_url = […]

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